Mick Hartley

Julie Burchill has some fun in the Spectator – What do Munroe Bergdorf and Andrew Tate have in common?

Munroe Bergdorf, a ‘transgender model’…has recently been appointed as the first ‘UK champion’ for the United Nations charity UN Women UK, which is allegedly dedicated to improving the lives of women and girls across the country. Before I get to the meat of the matter, I’d like to indulge in a few paragraphs’ pettiness.

Bergdorf, 36, is no stranger to cattiness ‘themselves’, having previously lost their cushy billet as an ‘LGBT adviser’ to Dawn Butler, then Labour’s shadow equalities secretary, after calling a woman a ‘hairy barren lesbian’ and boasting that they wanted to ‘gay bash’ a homosexual TV star. This followed Bergdorf being dumped by L’Oreal the year before for saying that all whites were racist, and that suffragettes were ‘white supremacists’.

If we’re name-calling here, why does someone who seeks to present as a living human woman look like a mummified boy-pharaoh? Bergdorf is one of those rich transvestites who’ve spent a fortune on facial surgery – unlike the poor ones, who tend to resemble bricklayers – but it hasn’t really worked, unless the aim was to look like something off Doctor Who. And why do the new transvestites all have names self-respecting strippers would sneer at? Paris, Juno, Munroe. You never hear of a Janice or an Audrey. ‘Munroe’ was born ‘Ian’. Why not simply change it to ‘Iona’? ‘Iona Penis’, even.

Bergdorf gives the phrase ‘failing up’ a whole new dimension, also having been stripped of their role as ambassador for Childline after Janice Turner of the Times questioned the advisability of putting ‘a porn model’ in such a role. They are the Eddie the Eagle of cross-dressing. So why on earth did the UN think this appointment was a good idea? So far as I know, Bergdorf has no record in campaigning against forced marriage, underage marriage, maternal morbidity and all those boring, uncool things which affect the lives of actual underprivileged people of the female persuasion.

It’s because the point is to mock women by giving Bergdorf a job most women – having grown up as girls rather than boys, as Bergdorf did – could do much better. Bergdorf’s UN appointment aims to diss the girls and make them cry, or at least howl with indignation, as a whopping 17 women’s rights organisations have. This might sound like terf paranoia if the UN did not have such a record of misogyny. As it is, I’d go so far as to say that the UN has found a more subtle way of continuing its war against women, displayed so shamelessly in everything from the rampant sexual abuse of women and girls in war-zones who their operatives were meant to be protecting, to the 57 days it took them to properly condemn the mass rapes of Hamas….

‘Transwomen’ are doing so well – promoted and published laughably beyond their capabilities – because they really do have the best of both worlds, despite their desire to take top prize at the Victimhood Olympics. They are not concerned with feminism, so they can suck up to men in the way real women once had to. They play the dupes like fiddles, to be fair. ‘Transwomen’ are what a certain sort of angry little man wishes women were still like. Why can’t all feminists be nude models who run club nights called Pussy Palace, as Bergdorf did? What is sexual harassment for us is sexual affirmation for them, as witnessed in that super-creepy piece by Paris Lees in which they gloried in being ‘sexually objectified and treated like a piece of meat’. What a relief this must be to men who are fuming that cat-calling is no longer considered a top turn-on by real women.

But on the other hand, you can tell they are men, because those other weird men who generally fear and/or loathe women make an exception for them. They listen to them and take them seriously. As Ricky Gervais brilliantly skewered them; ‘Oh, women! Not all women, I mean the old-fashioned ones. The old-fashioned women, you know, the ones with wombs. Those dinosaurs. I love the new women. They’re great, aren’t they? The new ones. The ones with beards and cocks. They’re as good as gold. I love them.’ Andrew Tate, that arch-hater of women, has a routine where he talks about how it’s ‘gayer’ to have sex with an ugly woman than with a beautiful transvestite. Wouldn’t it be great if these two could get together and take each other off the market? Because despite their apparent differences, Tate and Bergdorf – both strange, sexually-tormented outliers of the men’s rights movement – are two testicles of the same scrotum.