Mick Hartley

Tony Blair’s apologised; Ken Livingstone’s apologised; the Church of England has apologised. In the circumstances I feel moved to add my voice to the chorus. Yes, I apologise for the slave trade.

Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone apologised? I think the world would be a much much better place if everyone apologised. And not just for the slave trade. For, well, for everything, really.

I mean, it all started out so well, didn’t it? – those lovely cave paintings and the little figurines. Then there was that ghastly business with the neanderthals, and, well, one hardly knows where to begin. Murder and mayhem everywhere. Absolutely frightful. Anyway I really am most terribly terribly sorry.